Me: BS, 60s; Him: WS, 60s; 2 adult children; Married 43 yrs on D-Day; D-Day 11/4/2023 of 13-year EA; WS sent AP no contact email; D-Day 1/13/2025 that it was really 13-year PA. R is a work in progress.
Contact AP? - I really want your advice
My first post. My story is in my bio, but I'll add it here also.
11/4/23 - WS handed me his phone so that I could help with something on it. Email exchange w/AP was on phone screen. WS admitted to 13-year EA w/AP. I told WS to pick just one of us, me or AP, his choice. WS sent AP no contact email and blocked AP from phone and email. Got into counseling.
1/11/24 - AP called our home early one morning. I answered - AP hung up. Caller ID displayed her place of work (small employer). I called AP back and left message for her to call me back or I would call her husband. AP didn't call back, so I followed through and called her husband about EA. He was dumbstruck.
~12/24 - I found SI. Read a LOT - great stuff. WS's story just wasn't all adding up for me, but I had no proof of PA. Challenged WS to take polygraph (thank you SI). Failed polygraph on 1/13/25. Truth came out that it was 13-year PA. Yes, that was 14 months of trickle truth - ouch.
I want to email AP to let her know what I think of her. All I really want is for her to read it, but I wouldn't mind having her shake in her boots a little! (A bit vindictive, I know.) I composed the email months ago and have edited it to where I'm happy with it.
My question for all you wise ones: which option?
A. Don't send the email. Just save it as a draft or discard it.
B. Send the email, asking her for a brief response - just so I know that she read it. Include a deadline for response or I will contact her husband with evidence of PA.
C. Send the email asking for a complete timeline (when, what, where) or I will contact her husband with all that I now know. Include a deadline for response. This is the version to get her shaking in her boots. I don't really want to read her version of the timeline as I already know too much.
D. Option I'm not thinking of.
Thanks all. I sure wish I wasn't here.
8 comments posted: Saturday, May 24th, 2025
